Falcon Presto. Alfonso Crept. Frances Ploot. Preston Falco. The four of them crack reporters in a cracked world. These people bring you the stories no one else dares to.
Presto - former Marvel employee, fired for knowing too much. Has a really big nose.
Crept - ex CIA agent and bullshit world record holder. Picks at his feet.
Ploot - sophisticated, buxom, an arse to kill for and an ability that we can only talk about on www.sexmeupbaby.com.
Falco - one of the other three writing under a bad pseudonym.
These are Spoof Central - be afraid or just piss off!
We've lost sight of our initial goals. The world is moving faster now than it ever has. You didn't know that did you? That time is faster now than it was in the 1970s. Hell, according to studiers conducted by the Ministry of Steak, time went really slow in the 1930s. And that's why we're losing our intentions in a welter of despair and girl's with semen stains on their black bras. Initially comics were to have been counter-revolutionary and subversive in the extreme; a Superman comic wasn't just about fighting crime it was about Jimmy Olsen dressing up as a woman and wanting Superman's sperm tickling his prostate gland. It was about Lois Lane doing anything she could that involved getting into Superman's pants. Unfortunately she then had to get through the tights, but this was the 1950s.
Remember the Silver Surfer? He was about calling the government a bunch of big fat liars, while Rocket Racer was about running out of ideas and being a wanker. Possibly some of the most important comics ever have been written by me and yet I don't possess the subtlety or the nous to be able to compete with guys like Gardner Fox and Mort Weisinger - guys that could write better stories in a day than I can in a month of frenzied work.
There are subversive comics again. They will be reappearing gradually over the coming months. Most of them are, obviously, written by me and drawn by my group of cronies and liggers, but we think that if you aren't sickened by them you'll still buy them because I wrote them. One of the subversive books I'm working on is about political oppression and sexual politics in Australia. It's called POSSUM COME and is, sort of, illustrated by Ashley Wood. When I say sort of, I mean it's 'drawn' using Ashley's own jizzum and some squid ink and each copy is hand drawn and lettered. The print run was only 60 before Ash started to complain about an aching wrist and severe pain in his scrotum, but we think the finished product will baffle and amaze you.
Another of the now much needed envelope pushing subversive and nail-bitingly crucial comics coming out soon is by my mate Ian and is called SAND. Remember how you are often reminded that we are but grains of sand on a beach that is the universe? Well this is about what it's like to be a grain of sand on a beach in the universe and how so very unfair it is. Ian's got some artist I don't rate to draw it, guy called Darrow, I think he's French and we all know what the French are famous for, don't we? Yeah, killing comics. And being technophobes.
Before I go I want to talk briefly about one of the most subversive shows on television at the moment. You gits in the States will get it on BB--0-148088710-1051911571=:50788-- --0-451901360-1053647109=:55040--
We need name for the Spoofer's Message Board. Make your suggestions at Spoof Central HQ.
