The Good, The Bad, & This Kid: “Loaded Memory”

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Friday, August 29, 2003

2:00 p.m.

Current Mood: Ecstatic

Current Tunes: Led Zeppelin – Misty Mountain Hop

My friend Vern told me I should start one of these “blogs,” so here I am. He says that it’s a good way to get things off your chest, along with shameless self promotion - enter my new novel. The fine people in the editorial department over at Cold Publishing called me up early this morning and said, “Mr. O’Hare, we’ve read over your manuscript and we’d like to put it to print.” Then I sort of blanked, other than that I only remember them saying stuff about the ending maybe needed some tweaks. Artistic integrity is over rated anyway. So, this will be my sophomore Novel, Passing Days did great for a first time novelist, so hopefully Letters In Blue will do just as good, if not better. Well, I got a tee time in like 30 minutes, so come back for updates.

7:30 p.m.

Current Mood: Indifferent

Current Tunes: Don Henley – Boys of Summer

Dammit, I just lost 50 bucks. Golf is no good when you lose. Not a sport my arse. Day was not a total wash out though, I did get to tell my friends about my new novel. Felt a slight picayunish though, since most of them are on their third or fourth novels. Neil’s working on his sixth for Christ’s sake, either way they were happy for me. They couldn’t let this opportunity slip away, more beleaguerment on my “funny book” days. A man writes comic books for four years and loses all credibility as a significant writer, it’s just not right. I know Vern and them were just teasing me, but it gets to me sometimes, and I know it really shouldn’t. No one should be ashamed of their roots, I mean I’m not really, I had a blast writing JLA and Nightwing, my Eisner award is one of my proudest moments, right under when Stacey said she’d go out with me way back in 11th grade. I’m still well received in the comic industry, my creator owned series Trivial has spawned two collections, both of which are in 2nd and 3rd printings. That’s saying a lot I know, but it also held me down for awhile, not really with the publishers, but with fellow writers. They did, and many still do, judge me as a faux writer, saying that Passing Days was just a fluke, hopefully Letters In Blue will shut them up. I might have to change my mood to angry now.

Saturday, August 30, 2003

1:05 p.m.

Current Mood: Troubled

Current Tunes: Radiohead – Paranoid Android

Woke up this morning with another call from Cold. Apparently they have more than a slight problem with the ending to Letters In Blue. They feel that ending the book with a rape scene would enrage the reader, and might hurt the sales. I’m thinking, “no shit!” It’s meant to enrage the reader, it’s meant to engage the reader too. The book is a bloody tragedy, what’d they want, for Claire and Nick to get out of rehab and ride off in the bloody sunset? That wouldn’t be real to the characters, it would kill the story. It’s in a Jacobean mindset. I’m still debating it out with them, I’m not bending in my approach to this. If they don’t like it, I’ll have Vern send it to a different publisher. Vern’s the best damn Lit agent there is, maybe I’ll have him call Cold, he’ll make them see it my way.

Monday, September 1, 2003

11:15 a.m.

Current Mood: Slightly Victorious

Current Tunes: Monotone Cheering

Well, Vern came through, sort of. He got the Claire rape scene to stay in, the only catch is that it has to show Claire living. The way I had it before, it was up to the reader to determine if Claire made it through another traumatizing ordeal. Perhaps I’m the only one who feels that readers can think for themselves, that they are capable of filling in blanks and looking past what’s thrown in front of them. I guess this comes from my days as a comic writer. Comic readers, for the most part, are bloody sharp individuals. They are more than able to fill in the gaps left by writers, in fact that’s the real sport of it all. That’s what reading’s all about, if you want it all laid out for you, rent a damn Hollywood movie. Phone’s ringing…

3:30 p.m.

Current Mood: Awe

Current Tunes: No time for Tunes, Mr. Jones

That was strange, I just got invited to a seminar being held by Tessa Minerva at the local Community College. I thought she hated me, maybe she just wants me there so I pale in her comparison, I’m there to be her lower class foil. Her and her 12 books, 12! So yeah, I’m going to attend, it should be interesting enough, better than churning up a makeshift ending to my book. I can’t wait to hear Tessa rant on and on about herself, I remember Neil’s little party last year, woman would not shut up about how many
copies of Sad Lover’s Lane she sold in it’s first month.

Tuesday, September 2, 2003

10:24 a.m.

Current Mood: Hung Over

Current Tunes: Pounding in Head

Damn you Tessa, damn you and you’re, “I’m so rich, I can buy my friends several rounds,” attitude. Computer screen’s so damn bright, thank the Lord for sunglasses. I wonder how stupid I look right now, wearing sunglasses in my boxers with the damn window shades pulled down.

8:47 p.m.

Current Mood: Sober

Current Tunes: Tool – Sober

Seriously though, why can’t I not be sober? More harassment last night, this time at the hands of Tessa and her “we’re real authors” friends. That’s why she really invited me to her seminar, for her after party, so she could hold up my Trivial collection and mock me in front of all her important friends. This bull is really getting old. These people don’t know how much blood, sweat, and tears goes into creating a comic on a monthly basis. I’ve earned my spot as a novelist dammit. I wonder if screenplay writers get this much shit if they start writing novels? Five will get you ten that they don’t. No, movies are an accepted piece of American culture, people who write movies are more respected. That’s such a load, I’ve seen far more bad films than I’ve read bad comics. Just cause the majority of comics have overly drawn people in spandex doesn’t mean the story isn’t well crafted. Besides, there are tons of well written indie comics out that have nothing to do with spandex. Interesting note, dressed up like Batman a couple Halloweens ago, not too comfortable. Needless to say, went home alone. Back to the point at hand, it really sickens me all the slack I’m getting for starting in the comic field, it’s not like I use to kill infants.

Thursday, September 4, 2003

8:39 p.m.

Current Mood: Immensely Hurt

Current Tunes: PJ Harvey – Bring You My Love

Vern called this morning, Cold Publishing pulled out on my book. They claim that its risk is too high, they don’t feel it’ll do well after the first month. This is just the icing on the bloody cake, first I’m continually getting shit from multi-award winning authors, and now Letters In Blue has been pulled by one of the best book publishers in North America. Vern tells me he’ll send it off to some other publishers later this afternoon, but the way I see it, if Cold Publishing didn’t even want to risk it, who will? This is just my typical luck, all goes fantastic until one single moment when the cloth is pulled and my card castle comes crashing down. I’m starting to wonder if it’s even worth it.

Saturday, September 6, 2003

5:29 p.m.

Current Mood: Despair

Current Tunes: Nine Inch Nails – The Downward Spiral

It’s over. Everything I’ve worked so hard at has come to a blistering halt. Vern quit, he says it’s nothing personal it’s all business. No one will even look at Letters In Blue. I’ve been playing the same damn song all day, and it’s starting to make sense. The highlight of my “lustrous” career has been my run on Justice League, how overwhelmingly sad is that. When I was a kid I use to tell my Grandma how I would grow up and write the next great American Novel, and she would say to me, “Earl, as long as you believe in yourself, there is nothing in this world that you can’t do.” How damn naïve I’ve been, I believed her up until today. I now see that people only want novels from bitches like Tessa and blue blooded hacks like Edward Romanes. There is no space for a novel that invokes real emotions and tells a truly compelling story. Those books get caught up in the logistics of the publishing business. Artistic value has gone out the proverbial window, along with “career.” This is where I say I’ve had enough, “a lifetime of fucking things up, fixed in one determined flash.”

The Good

The past week or so has seen continuing coverage here at SBC of the new comic company called Viper Comics, and I’m jumping on the bandwagon. I recently got a promotional copy of Viper’s [email protected] and Moonrush. When I first heard about these two comics, Dead instantly caught my eye, it sounded like a well rounded idea, and not like everything else being put out. I read over the little preview and it’s pulled me in. Dead is definitely on my “to buy” list. Josh Howard, the creator of Dead, has an art style that I really admire, it’s a nice balance between classic cartooning and “new-age” cartooning. What I’m saying is, that it has a hint of the anime style while not fully going anime.

Besides the interesting story, a girl who’s best friend is murdered which unearths the evils in a small town, and besides the great art style, this book was created by a guy with a great first name. Moreover, what could be hotter than two little girls with a battleaxe? Check out Viper at Viper Comics. Also, check out the interview Josh Howard did for SBC at Josh Howard is [email protected].

Well, that’ll do it for me this week, like always I’ll be back next Saturday, only this time I’ll be a few thousand dollars poorer. Buying a new notebook and fixing car problems really puts a strain on an already strained wallet. ‘Til next time…

-J. Sto

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