Signing On...

By Tony Lee

So yesterday was my big signing day at Orbital comics.

Now, I know I've been going on about this quite a lot recently and people have been saying to me 'why are you so worried? It's only a signing' but you see? I haven't actually done many store signings in my time.

Balderdash, I hear you cry. The price of unsigned Tony Lee comics are higher than signed ones – because there's less of them, and all that. It's true, I've done a lot of signings. I've done my time on the Markosia booth at conventions, I've sat at Imperium comics trying to convince small children to buy books with zombies, I've signed at almost every convention I've been at.

But a store signing? I've only ever done three. The other two were both in July 2006.

And I'm going to tell you about them. Aren't I nice.

The first signing was in Stevenage. Starship Troopers was out, Midnight Kiss was still 'waiting for the final issue' and I'd just finished a three part Doctor Who story in Panini Comics. For some reason I believed that this was the moment, this was the day that I should sign my copies of Starship Troopers in an Ottakers in Stevenage.

They had adverts up in the windows, big ones. But on the day itself? There were a couple of issues with the event. Firstly we were right in a corner of the mall, next to a Waterstones that had 'it's Pirate Day' banners everywhere. Bring your kid to see some writer bloke or play with Pirates? Yes, not much of a choice there. And secondly? Nobody had a bloody clue who I was.

Luckily I had my erstwhile chum the Laird Boultwood and he kept me company during the long, long hours between 1pm and 4pm. In that time? I had a grand total of twelve signings.

Stevenage, 2006. Tony with an actual reader....

The biggest problem was that they had labelled me as a 'Doctor Who writer' and yet I had nothing Doctor Who related to sign. Of the twelve signings? Eight were copies of Starship Troopers and Shadowmancer. Two were copies of the Gloom that Dan was able to sign. One was a copy of Doctor Who Magazine that one industrious young chap had managed to go across the mall to a WH Smith and buy. And the final one, which was the first of the day and my first ever signing? Went as follows.

Woman: "Hello. Could you sign this, please?"
Me: "I'm sorry, this is a Doctor Who novel. I didn't write this."
Woman: "Oh." (pause) "Could you sign it anyway?"
Me: (pause) Sure. Okay."

But was it a success? Of course it was. Because even though I spent three hours for about four signings an hour, many of these kids had never seen these comics before and who knows, down the line they might have gotten into them because of my work.

But as baptism of fires go, it was a doozy.

The second signing was later that month, in Midtown Comics, New York. I was spending a week following San Diego in New York that year and, with Starship Troopers hitting trade levels Midtown thought it'd be fun to do a signing. Me, Neil Kleid and Mike Oeming. Now, I knew that I'd recently crashed and burned in Stevenage, but firstly this was New York, and they know their comics in New York – and secondly I was doing it with two of my most favourite East Coastians so I'd have a blast.

A week or so before the signing, I get news that Chuck Satterlee had managed to get himself put on the ticket. I didn't know Chuck bar emails but he seemed nice enough, he was doing a lot of Markosia work at the time, so what the hell.

Then came the day of the signing. Because we now had one extra writer, they had to add a separate table. No longer was it a simple line, now it was a weird L shape. Oeming had books like Powers to sign. Kleid had hardback copies of his amazing Brownsville – editors, seriously. Give this guy work. He's damned good, you know – and Chuck had about twenty different books, all of which he placed on the second table, pretty much covering it in Markosia goodness. And me? I got dumped in the corner.

The New York Four, 2006 – Oeming, Kleid, me, Satterlee...

The signing was fun, but again if I signed more than five books? I'd be impressed. Kleid and Satterlee did a healthy showing but the obvious star of the show was Oeming. The queue stretched for him and like the consummate (and then mullet-headed) showman that he was, he lured them to his table with tricks and candy.

And then we all went to the pub, or as the Americans say 'Bar'.

So with these two minor success/failures behind me, it's no surprise that its taken two years for someone to drag me back into a store to do a signing. And the man that managed it? Was Damian Keeng.
Damian runs, owns, is the overlord of, take your pick of Orbital comics and a couple of years back at a Chris Ryall / Simon Furman / Nick Roche signing, Damian offered the space to me and Dan for when we released Hope Falls later that year. Of course we said 'sure, let's talk about it later' but I never thought anything would happen with it. And then, out of the blue I get an email – how's about a signing with Gary Russell?

Now, I'm a massive Gary Russell fan, as far as I'm concerned he is one of the main reasons that Doctor Who stayed alive in fans minds long enough for the new season to be restarted. And currently, he's the IDW script editor on the Doctor Who stories they produce. A nicer man in Doctor Who there isn't, and even if no bugger turned up, the chance to chat with him for a couple of hours? Easily the best decision I'd ever make.

Of course, I wondered if it had been the right decision when halfway through last week I had an email from Damian asking if I had copies of The Forgotten because they had sold out... Luckily a Friday rush by Orbital dug up enough illicit copes (about forty or so) for me to sign.

And so yesterday I arrived at Orbital with a nervous step. I had no idea what would happen. They had advertised it on the site, they had flyers, there was a Facebook page, I'd mentioned it left right and centre – and as I arrived at ten to two –
There was no queue. There was no crowd of people standing around the block. There were no banners. I'd even left my own one at home, so as to not upstage Gary. Had I made the right decision here?

I needed a good omen, and one turned up in the shape of an old friend, Roz who, walking past the store and not even realising I wrote comics saw my name and, amused that someone with my name was signing was phoning another friend of mine to see if it was me as I turned up. I haven't seen her for years, and it was a great moment. And totally focused me on the task in hand.

Gary Russell, Tony Lee. They fight crime...

I sat down beside Gary who made me feel at home. A veteran of many such signings, he was already at ease. With him joking beside me and with Tracy giving me a silent thumbs up as she stood off to the side with comics chum Harry Markos, there to give me support, I was ready to go. And then there was a shock announcement. They were going to let the queue in.

There was a queue?

Oh yes, dear reader. There was a queue indeed. A lovely, Doctor Who shaped queue.

The signing starts...

I won't go into the details of the day, suffice that Orbital sold out of copies of the Agent Provocateur trade and the copies of The Forgotten that they scrounged. We had cosplayers – a Tenth Doctor called Andrew and a Captain Jack called Pete. Not only did they valiantly hang around all day, they even came to the pub afterwards with us.

Andrew and Pete...

The day had its levels of surprises as well. Apart from people I knew were coming to say hi – Lee 'Budgie' Barnett and his son Phil, one of my oldest and best friends Michael Mastakin with fellow Millarworld chum James Dodsworth came by, Cassandra 'the future of the Eagle Awards' Conroy, my Dad and my uncle Jackie turned up – this was the first thing like this that my Dad had ever attended, so I hope he was proud of me – Friends like Elle, Bry, Karen and Ant came by – and then some bloke walked up, handed me a comic and said 'can you sign this?'

It was a copy of 'ANIS'. A piss take comic I made in 1994 with chum Mark Appleby to celebrate our friend Anis Ahmed's 30^th Birthday. The ACTUAL HONEST TO GOD first comic I ever 'wrote'. And holding it? The man himself, who I hadn't seen for about thirteen years.

Tony and Anis...

I used to spend days in his Hounslow comic shop The Twilight Zone back in the early nineties – and it's where Michael and I met back in the day. Now he works as a presenter for QVC. My Dad, taking photos and being introduced to him only realised after Anis left that not only did he recognise Anis from the QVC technology show, but the camera he was using to take photos? Was probably sold to him by Anis on TV. And it was great to catch up with him and other old Twilight Zone attendee Kate who popped along with him. He is probably the reason I write comics right now, as he produced the first 'Twilight Zone Comics' story of mine that kept me interested in writing them, and therefore having Anis tell me he was proud of me? Was a nice moment. Almost as nice as seeing my Dad's face when he realised that all this crowd, all this hoo-hah? Was in part due to me.

We did an interview. I forget who it was for. I told lots of spurious lies.

And then it was over, we'd sold out, the pub was calling. Gary and I, now I hope firm friends said our goodbyes – I'm seeing him in Manchester in three weeks so it's not a major farewell – and I was taken by Neville, one of the Orbital staff to a local bar for the post-signing drinks. Suffice to say that may people who couldn't make the signing, people like Ade Brown, Anna Mondo and Dave Montieth made the bar. What a shock.

The Angel Pub, 9 p.m....

Yesterday was an important day as it was the anniversary, the fourth in fact of my Mum's passing. And to have my Dad there and Michael, who was as much her unofficial 'fourth' son back in the day made it easier. There were tears later, when the drink settled, but Tracy looked after me and for that I will always love her.

And maybe a good, solid Whisky American.

But my Mum? She was there yesterday. In my friends who appeared without realising it was me. In my family who attended a signing of mine for the first time. In old friends who came to give me support, and new friends who came to tell me how much they loved my comic.

Thank you one and all who attended.

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So what's next? Well, this coming weekend is the Birmingham Comic con, and I'll be there doing signings at my booth (yes, I have a booth now) and a variety of panels. If you're around, come and say hi. I'm also one of the judges of the BICS / 2000 A.D. script contest. As I said above, contestants – I like a nice whisky. Say no more, eh?

And that's it kiddies, it's still morning on Sunday and it's a lovely day. I made Tracy spend all day yesterday in a comic shop, so today we're going to go out. Have a good one yourselves, and I'll see you in seven. As I'll be talking about the Birmingham con, it might be a little late as it'll be written during the Sunday, but we'll see...

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© 2008, Tony Lee

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