Room Service...

By Tony Lee

I love hotels.

I mean it, I absolutely love hotels. There's something about arriving at a nice, four star hotels at check in time and unpacking in your nice clean room, sleeping in a big, soft bed and then laying on it watching TV while considering whether you need to wander down to breakfast yet that really does it for me that really pushes my buttons.

I was probably a Rock Star in a previous life or something as I'm never happier than when I'm 'on tour'.

Tony outside the Bunratty Castle Hotel...

Now, I know there are a couple of things it can be, this love of the four and five star that I have. Firstly, I live in a shared house, with my mate Craig and his other half Emma. To all intents and purposes, although the house is communal, my room is my own space and that's where everything I own pretty much lives. A hotel room? Well, suddenly I'm there alone, no other people wandering through, no queues for the shower (although to be honest since I started working my own schedule that's not exactly been an issue except on weekends) and the entire culture shock works in my favour.

Secondly, way back into the past, when the world was in black and white and we fought dinosaurs for tea, I worked as a street entertainer, made a bit of money and in true 'I have another show tomorrow, this money isn't needed right now' fashion I would spend money like water, buying show tickets off scalps at extortionate costs with nary a care, drink until I – well, drink more and then spend the remainder on hotel rooms for the night if I was too drunk to get a cab home. And this happened a lot back then.

But I do so love hotel rooms. And more importantly? I love opulent hotel rooms. I was on holiday with Tracy last week in Ireland and on one occasion we were given a four star room with a spa attached to the cost of the bill – which meant of course we got to wander around the exclusive club in our bathrobes and go swimming and sit in Jacuzzis – but on the final night in Dublin, at the Clontarf Castle we had the 'Royal Suite', a room that not only had two 42" plasma screens, but a four poster bed, and an entirely different room for working in complete with sofas and a dining area with windows overlooking Dublin...

And this is the sort of room I like. When I was at New York earlier this year for the New York Comic Con, I shared a room with Sean Dulaney at the Milford Plaza. Now, the Plaza is a beautiful hotel, it's also incredibly security conscious and it's about a two minute walk from Times Square. It's worth the money, until you see the rooms. They're quite nice, but due the old hotel occasionally they're quite small here and there – the single room I had on the first night was actually bigger than the twin I moved to for Sean's arrival. However I think this was due to a shortage of rooms as we already know that the room was out of date as the plug socket was knackered and blew me across the room with an electric shock that should have given me superpowers, dammit.

Tony Milford Plaza. Standard Room...

Of course the hotel were very apologetic and moved me to a suite to make up for it – suddenly Sean and I both had rooms and there was a main 'living area'. And we had passes to the 'Milford Club' where we could check our emails and eat complimentary croissants. Nom nom nom.

Yes, I think I decided here that this was how I wanted to spend my conventions.

And since then, I've stayed at a variety of hotels. You see, the bane of any freelancer's life is that they have to spend a lot of time on the road. New York is a week. San Diego makes two. Then we have the UK conventions – Bristol? Friday to Monday, three nights where at least one of these, usually the Saturday you can pretty much lay money on the table that you'll spend a passing acquaintance with the room rather than a good night's sleep. Out of the last four Bristols? I would say the Saturday nights has seen me spend a total of about ten hours sleep in the room. Combined. In 2006 we just stayed in the bar. 2005 and 2007 we went to bed around 6am to be up by 9am. Only last year did I go to bed early – and by that I mean 5.30am. Jon Davis-Hunt kept me up an hour later than I was going to stay up, too – he wanted to see in the dawn and the 2000 A.D. guys had champagne. And then, as Jon convinced us all to stay up? He went to bed...

Birmingham is in two weeks and for a shock change I don't need to worry about a room, as I live about four miles from the centre anyway and Dan Boultwood is crashing on my floor. I'm doing a signing in London this Saturday coming and again I don't need a room, as I'll be staying at Tracy's for the weekend. Dan won't be crashing on Tracy's floor.

But then we hit the 'busy' part. October? I'm in Manchester for the Literary Festival on the 18th, most likely staying the night after being a guest at a Doctor Who 'mini-con' held in a pub. The week after is two nights in the Novotel while attending the MCM London Expo. And then, three weeks after that? I'm in the Park Plaza in Leeds for two nights while attending the Thought Bubble festival in Leeds. There's a part of me that dreads conventions and hotels – and there's a part of me that sings happily as I get to 'check in'. I even look up luggage for sale on Ebay in case I want to buy a new suitcase. And don't even get me started on the OCD joy that occurs every time I do an overseas convention – OCD that eventually needs a detailed Excel spreadsheet to make sure I've packed everything.

Next year, I have even more fun. On the 3rd of February, a Tuesday I fly to New York to stay once more at the Milford Plaza – they've made me a very nice deal to make up for the 'almost killing me' bit last year – for eight days, the middle few being filled with New York Comic Convention stuff while the book end days at the start and finish will be spent seeing my New York chums in 'out of convention' situations. And then, the Wednesday after the New York Comic Con? I get flown to Los Angeles where I then spend five nights in a Marriott Hotel for the Gallifrey 2009 Convention, of which I am a guest. So, before flying back, I'll be spending two weeks in four star accommodations.

Photo Courtesy of Vickie Sebring
This of course gives me a lovely packing dilemma. Because apparently New York in the beginning of February? Blizzard conditions. Dress like Scott of the Antarctic on a really cold day. And then LA? Sunny and hot, as ever. So I need snow wear and beach wear, all in the same baggage, all under that mythical 'checked in baggage' limit...

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So. Posh hotels aside, let's talk about my favourite thing. Me.

This weekend coming, I will be at Orbital Comics in London at their 'Orbital Manga' store to sign copies of Doctor Who: the Forgotten with Gary Russell, who'll be signing copies of his own Doctor Who series, Agent Provocateur.

I'm not asking how Orbital are getting the comics; I just know that this will be one of the few times in the UK that you'll be able to buy it. So come along to the store on Upper St Martin's Lane between 2pm and 4pm and say hi. Come in costume too!

There's a Facebook events page too for this. There will be a post-signing drink at The Angel Pub, just around the corner and up the road, near where the new 'Intrepid Fox' is from around 5pm. But be nice if you turn up, as my Dad will likely be there, and he still doesn't believe (foolish man) that I'm a 'big thing'. And he's never seen or met anyone who's not my family who reads my work. So feel free to say hello to him and say how great I am.

And if I'm a little off, quiet at all on the day? It's not that I'm being some kind of arsey writer (although I am) – it's that Saturday the 27th is the anniversary, four years ago of when my mother, Doreen Lee passed away.

My mum was a massive encouragement of my writing throughout my life, and from an incredibly early age she would listen to me tell her of my fantastic stories, things that would go on, week after week. And when she was too ill to move, the cancer finally winning the battle she fought for so many years, I would sit in a chair beside her and read her chunks of whatever story I was writing at the time. Until the day that I couldn't read any more to her, because she was gone.

One of my greatest achievements was that before she passed away, my Mum saw my first Marvel work and knew that I was finally returning to my dream. One of my greatest failures was that I started back in comics too late for her to see where I've gotten to in just five short years. And by pure chance, the anniversary of her passing is on the same day as one of my greatest moments, a signing for Doctor Who, no less. It's a bittersweet success, so if you do attend the signing and the pub after? Expect a few toasts in her name. She made me the writer that I am now.

And buy my Dad a drink.

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And of course that's not the only thing I'm doing over the next few weeks – because the following week is the Birmingham International Comic Show, or BICS for short, and Dan and I will be there, my friends. We have a booth. With a banner. And nothing yet to sell at it. We just wanted a table, to be honest. I'm not going to even be on it for most of the day, it'll be Dan's little sketching corner – I'll be signing Hope Falls and Midnight Kiss at the Markosia booth, the 2000 A.D. booth with Jon Davis-Hunt and attending some panels – on Saturday at 3.15pm I'll be discussing the world's greatest Graphic Novel with Tim Pilcher, immediately after that I'm one of the judges on BICS Got Talent, which if you're a writer is well worth getting involved with as the winning pitch and story gets a paid slot in 2000 A.D., and then as ever I'm one of the 'celebrity guests' at Lee 'Budgie' Barnett and Ade Brown's excellent quiz show 'The Kryptonite Factor' at 5.15pm. Having been guest host of last years one, I'm expecting some stick at this one, so it'll be worth attending.

And then on the Sunday, as well as signings, I'll be at the BICS Got Talent final at 4.30pm and possibly at the DFC panel at 3pm. So as ever, expect me all over the place.

And two weeks after that I'm in Manchester, as mentioned above - The Lass O'Gowrie pub in Manchester in fact, for a Doctor Who pub mini con with people like Paul Cornell, Adrian Salmon, John Freeman and Gary Russell on the 18th as part of the Manchester Literary Festival. We're doing a variety of panels and I believe there is a special guest performer in the evening in the upstairs bar.
and the following week, the 25th and 26th I'll be at the London MCM Expo once more, sitting at a table with Dan, drinking real Guinness and judging Cosplay contests with people like Dave Hine, Frazer Irving, Andie Tong, Jamie McKelvie, Kieron Gillen, Dan Boultwood, Antony Johnston, Emma Vieceli, Ethan Van Scriver and Ben Templesmith. I'll be interviewing Ben on stage both days, so that should be fun.

You are of course quite welcome to come along to all events.

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And that's it for another week, next Monday's column will pretty much be a round up of this coming Saturday's shenanigans, so come along if you want to be photo'd and possibly even mentioned in these hallowed columns...

In the meantime, visit my LiveJournal, in particular THIS page where you'll see sneak pages of Bevis Musson and yours truly new graphic novel Journal: A Graphic Romance, out next year from AiT/Planet Lar.

And remember to keep buy 2000 A.D. , which currently has my series 'Stalag #666' in it. And for more exciting never-seen-before art from Doctor Who, if you haven't gone already, go read the Jen Contino's excellent interview with me at THE PULSE...

Because the more people who read me? Means the more people who demand me as a guest for conventions. Which means the more hotel rooms I get to stay in...

And I do so love hotel rooms. Oh yes, yes I do indeed...

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© 2008, Tony Lee

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