Take Me Back to the Ballgame...

By Tony Lee

Exactly a week ago as I write this on a Friday afternoon, I was in New York. A week ago I had just gained my professional’s pass and I was on the convention floor. It now seems so long ago, it seems like more than just a few days have passed. And yet? At the same time, it feels like yesterday.

And that’s the problem with conventions. They’re so goddamned addictive. You spend most of your life alone, sitting at a keyboard, usually in a room in your house, nobody else around to help you out, talk to, hang out with. And then a couple of times a year you go to these wondrous things, these conventions where suddenly you’re with hundreds of people who all understand what you mean. Hundreds of people who live in the exact same way that you do. It’s almost like coming home, it’s almost like fitting in. And if you’re like most of the people who write comics? This will be one of the few times a year that you do so.

I’d also like to take this moment to apologise to someone I forgot to mention last week, B Clay Moore. I caught him on the Friday lunchtime while I was with Josh and Marc, and I didn’t really speak much to him, or mention him in the column, even though he mentioned me in his. And I wanted to explain why. You see, I often namedrop friends and people I’m comfortable being classed as a professional next to. But with B Clay Moore? I’m not. No, I’m not saying he’s a douchebag or something – far from it – let me explain. Hawaiian Dick, one of Clay’s titles was one of the comics that brought me back into the industry, that inspired me to get back into writing comics—something that was incredibly important to me at the time, and in 2005 it was a very shy Tony who went and said hi to him at San Diego and then ran away like a church mouse. I’m not usually star struck, especially with someone who could be counted generationally as among my peers, but with B Clay Moore? I’m a fan.
I love his work and as yet he’s done no wrong in his comics. And, when I speak to him, be it online or in person? I forget that I’m a professional and suddenly I’m hanging out with this cool creator who gave me so much help online when I started doing PR for Markosia. So yes, Tony does get starstruck every now and then. It was good to see you, sir. I’m sorry I didn’t say so earlier.

(I love you.)

Ahem. But already the Americans move on—this weekend is Stumptown or Pittsburgh or half a dozen other places. In two weeks now it’s Bristol and the British contingent will descend upon a still unexpecting town in a frenzy of comics and beer. And beer will be drunk, oh yes. Last year the Ramada bar was drained dry on both nights and the two bar staff complained bitterly of being overworked. Hopefully this year? Someone listened.

But I still have two weeks to survive until then and currently I don’t know if I can. Because I have had the convention cold, the San Diego SARS, name it what you will, the collection of illnesses that you get in one lump sum when you spend a full weekend in a glorified air hanger with 60,000 people, many of whom don’t understand personal hygiene, and you don’t use hands cleanser enough. And to be honest at one of these? Not using every five minutes is classed as not enough. And so I got to the airport at JFK around 6pm on the Monday with the rumblings already starting, I managed to sleep on the plane and, once I got home at 1pm the following day, about 24 hours after I arrived at the airport, I found that I couldn’t sleep, and what I really wanted to do, more than anything in the world? Was lay down and die on the toilet. Because honestly? My convention diet is notoriously shite at the best of times, and this year it went as follows.

Tuesday: Arrived. Bowl of chips, several pints of beer. Big Mac and fries when hit hotel at 2 a.m.

Wednesday: No breakfast, two hot dogs, popcorn, one giant pretzel, chocolate and rice in the evening (as I was a baseball game.)

Thursday: One croissant, one Wendy’s meal, packet of crisps, lots of beer.

Friday: One croissant, roast beef sandwich with fries, lots of Guinness, stolen chips.

Saturday: One sausage and egg mcmuffin meal, two hotdogs, one giant pretzel, popcorn, beer, whisky.

Sunday: One croissant, some popcorn, bowl of fries, I seem to recall a burger but I might have been drunk.

So you can see that at a convention I eat like a slob and should really be dead. And this mixed with whatever nasty bugs I’d picked up over the weekend? Well, what they did was just make me very ill. And most of this week I’ve barely eaten. Of course, because I was weak and down and jet lagged, when I have eaten, I’ve only really eaten crappy food again. But in far less doses. Still, I’m starting to feel better now and with April now ended I shall start once more to eat healthy and go to the gym. I do actually enjoy that (unlike Rantz Hoseley who screams bitter curses at his step trainer), and I pay through the bloody nose for it, so I might as well make the most of it. But this week due to the illness and the jetlag, my get up and go has really got up and gone. It’s not been good at all. I have a ton of work to keep on top of and this has been my primary concern, but I’ve also had several extra things come onto my plate from NYCC and I really don’t want to drop the ball with any of them. So next week is work week. It’s get ahead of the curve again week. And then I can start to plan my Bristol convention more – which this year seems to be a lot more relaxed for me, Mike Alwood having dropped me off every panel bar one that the Geek Syndicate guys have asked me to host. Now I’ve already had people ask me if this is a smackdown, if Mike is unhappy with me, or if he’s annoyed at the things that have happened re: the Eagles, and I’ve said to them and I’ll say to you—Mike’s cut my panels this year because he felt I needed a break, especially after last year where I pretty much did every other panel throughout the day. I was burning out and Mike saw this, and he’s enabled me to enjoy this convention to its fullest. And so I thank him. Seriously.

And on the subject of the Eagles. I meant to speak about this before I went to New York, but I wasn't able to. And I posted this on my Livejournal last week.

It's no secret that I've been unhappy about the way that the Eagle Awards slightly cocked up the nominations this year, in particular dropping Dan Boultwood off an award and also forgetting to place Midnight Kiss. I've spoken several times about it, asking for clarification on what the hell was going on.

Well, this week I had an hour long conversation with Mike Conroy about the Eagles, after he very kindly called me up to talk about them. And to be honest? I totally believe what he says.

I have probably the second most read column here. Only Beau Smith is above me. And that's not an image I want. Whether you believe it or not, each column I write apparently has thousands of people read or link to it. I know, it's scary how bored the people in the world must be - but read it they do. And when I say 'Hey look— here's an award I can be nominated for' - people will follow my lead and do just that.

Two weeks back, an anonymous source sent me the actual list of nominations, with figures. I could see how many people voted for me, for Fraction, for anyone. And I could see that on these figures? There was no way that anyone could have believed that I had ballot stuffed.

But the problem is, that people did. Mike Conroy runs the Eagle awards, and he's a busy man. He's trying to get Comics International back on track, one of the twelve tasks of Hercules if ever I saw one. He left it up to several officers to look at and analyse the figures, and several of them felt that votes for me or Dan or Hope Falls were unnaturally high. Because of this, a couple of nominations were dropped. In hindsight, and with the figures in front of both of us, Mike agrees that actually, Dan did probably gain each of his many votes on his own talent and yes, people may have voted for him that came from me, but at the same time? This isn't illegal. And in fact Dan was mired deep in the list, and would only just have hit the top five after the more obvious cheats had been removed. But he was mistakenly dropped, and for that Mike holds his hands up.

If anything, it's a compliment to be told that the officers making these decisions felt that an accurate representation of people's opinions of me seemed rather high. It means that I'm progressing faster than people realise.

But here's the thing, guys. I'm getting sick now of anonymous messages, posts, replies etc., saying that Tony's a cheating fuck. I'm not, and never have been. Neither's Dan. And Mike doesn't need the shit being thrown around saying that he's manipulating the awards for his own means. He's not. And he never has done.

Midnight Kiss should have been in the top five for best reprint TPB. It's not, but this was because of a mistake, an actual, hands in the air 'crap, it was my fault'. And we're cool with that. As long as we know. Cassandra Conroy, Mike’s daughter and one of the people involved is doing her GCSE's right now - this award ceremony shouldn't even be on the radar while she revises, but on the radar it is, front and centre, taking time away from valuable time spent elsewhere. She admitted she may have dropped the ball, and to be honest, we're impressed she did such a good job regardless. We can't be pissed at her. She has more important things to worry about. Like her entire fucking future and whatnot.

Mike was informed by people who's opinion he believed that me and Dan has a few too many well placed nominations and so decided to drop a couple to make it fair. That none of these experts didn't really know Hope Falls, me or Dan, or see the massive PR push we'd given it, getting us both known more across the internet? Again, we're cool with that. It's not like we're A-listers or something. It sucks that Dan wasn't nominated, but Mike has apologised and will apologise again, right before the awards, giving Dan the credit he should have had. And we're okay with this. If anything we're more than okay as Mike doesn't need to do such a thing. Accidents happen. But we appreciate the gesture.

The Eagle Awards are the BAFTAS of the comic awards. They're the only serious awards the UK give—and yet they've had such a crappy time of it lately, and they have less people working on it than Dan and I have on our mock awards. They're heavily understaffed and overworked, and they get shit every minute of every day. And do you know what they get out of putting these awards on? Ulcers. Fuck all else, guys. They don't get paid to do this. They don't get 'kudos' for making them. Sometimes they make mistakes. Unfortunately me and Dan caught a couple of those this year. But that's all they were— mistakes. It wasn't manipulative, it wasn't an attack against us, it was a misinformed belief that we weren't as popular as we actually are.

So stop calling me a fucking cheat. And stop calling the awards a fucking joke. Because if you say either of these to my face? I'm punching you out. Mike deserves more respect than that. You want the Eagles to be the best that they can be?

Then offer your goddamned services next year.

---

Anyway, enough moaning. There’s something else I want to put out there. Several people dropped this to me this week, and I really want people to sit up and take notice.

"Official Press Release

23 April 2008 (Berkeley, CA) - Unknown to the general public, Frank Frazetta’s Swamp Demon, Runes of Ragnan, Willow Creek, G.I. JOE and 30 Days of Night artist Josh Medors has been fighting cancer for the past several months. In his time of need, Image Comics and Frazetta Comics have stepped in to organize an auction with all proceeds going straight to Josh.

"Josh is a good friend, father and artist. With the support from the comic industry that he loves so dearly, we can all help with costly medical bills and ease his pain just a little would be most appreciated," said Frazetta Comics Editor/Artist Jay Fotos. "We are under a crunch, for the show is just a few weeks away, so anyone that would like to donate please contact me as soon as you can so we can get your donations there for the auction in time, we are also taking PayPal donations as well that go directly to Josh."

Many of the industry's finest are donating items to auction, including Frank Frazetta himself. Any other creators interested in donating are encouraged to contact Jay Fotos at jayfotos@cox.net.

The Josh Medors Benefit Auction will take place Saturday, May 10th at the Emerald City Comic Con. If you would like to make a PayPal donation, please do so to jmedors1@insight.rr.com.

Contributors thus far:

• Frank Frazetta


• Jerry Beck


• Brian Haberlin


• Tom Beland


• Mark Kidwell


• Todd McFarlane


• Nat Jones


• Tony Moore


• Peter Bergting


• Richard Starkings


• Steve Niles


• Kody Chamberlin


• Jay Fotos


• Rick Remender


• Christian Beranek


• Ahmet Zappa


• Image Comics


• IDW Publishing


• Zenescope Entertainment

Image Comics is a comics and graphic novels publisher formed in 1992 by a collective of best-selling artists. Since that time, Image has gone on to become one of the largest comics publishers in the United States. There are currently four partners in Image Comics (Erik Larsen, Todd McFarlane, Marc Silvestri and Jim Valentino), and Image is currently divided into four major houses (Todd McFarlane Productions, Top Cow Productions, Shadowline and Image Central). Image comics and graphic novels cover nearly every genre, sub-genre and style imaginable, offering science fiction, romance, horror, crime fiction, historical fiction, humor and more by the finest artists and writers working in the medium today. Visit www.imagecomics.com."

Go and make Daddy proud. My Paypal is on the fritz but by the time this is published, my donation should have gone through.

---

And that’s it, really—apart from saying a big well done to Billy Tucci for being made some kind of hoity toity ambassador to the French and all that. And to Mike Oeming for – well, actually I don’t know what for. But I’m sure whatever it was? He did it great.

Me? I intend to get some of this work done. And also find a place I can get hold of NY Mets games as already I’m starting to get withdrawal symptoms...

See you in seven days, kiddies.

---

Discuss this column at the Only A Forum forum.
© 2008, Tony Lee

---