Top 10 Skimpiest Costumes In ComicsA column article, Top Ten by: Justin Carmona
Who doesn't love a good superhero comic? They're full of larger than life characters, intense drama and epic action. Oh, and not to mention some of the most scantily clad (drawn) women you'll see anywhere. It's no wonder that the vast majority of readers are males. Sorry ladies, I don't see many of you interested in the…
TOP 10 SKIMPIEST COSTUMES IN COMICS OF ALL TIME!
10) POISON IVY
This sexy Batman villainess dresses about as all natural as DC Comics editorial will allow her to. Usually sporting nothing but a green one-piece skin tight outfit and a few leaves to cover herself up, Poison Ivy really knows how to get a guys attention. And those lovely red locks of hers just enhance her skimpy attire. I bet after he's captured her, the Caped Crusader runs home to the Batcave for a cold shower. Hmm… I wonder if all those leaves shrivel up and fall off during autumn. Now that I gotta see.
Susan Storm aka the Invisible Woman, the wholesome wife of Reed Richards and team member of the Fantastic Four, has always been thought of as the June Cleaver of comics. That is until the evil Psycho-Man took advantage of her fragile state and amplified her dark side turning her into Malice, Mistress of Hate. Not only did her dark side come out, but apparently so did her kinky one. Just look at Sue in her Malice get-up. Looks like she has a secret dominatrix fetish in her as well. Damn, if I were Reed I'd have run to the naughty store and picked up some whips and chains and let good ‘ol Susie take out some of that pent-up aggression on me.
8) SUE STORM
Wait. This can't be right. You mean to tell me goody two-shoes Susie Storm makes this list twice consecutively? Hey, what can I tell you? It was the 90's and Marvel wanted to turn every team book they had that wasn't the X-Men into, well… the X-Men. Hence, the very revealing outfit (which is a total rip off of the X-Man's Psylocke's outfit) she wore. I give her credit though for cleverly incorporating the number 4 in just the right spot. This outfit made the adventurer, wife and mother (poor Franklin probably thought his mommy danced at night to help make ends meet) just seem totally out of character. Hey, I like sexy outfits as much as the next guy, but I'm glad Marvel eventually came to their senses and covered this lady up.
This alien warrior princess from another world really knew how to get the men of earth to accept her as one of our own. Those thigh high boots alone is enough to drive most guys ape-shit! It's no wonder this scantily clad vixen even had an on-again off-again relationship with Batman's former sidekick Robin aka Dick Grayson. You know that sexy skintight costume really did a number on him when he hooked up with her and didn't even consider catching some kind of weird-ass alien STD. Damn, who ever thought aliens from another planet could look this hot?
6) EMMA FROST
Most fanboys look fondly upon the New X-Men era of comics writer Grant Morrison had done on the book because of his breakthrough storytelling, giving us some of the most outrageous and brilliant stories the X-Men have had in years. Me? I look fondly upon the Morrison era for one reason and one reason alone… Emma Frost's new costume. I mean, Frost aka the White Queen, has always been known to wear some of the sexiest outfits in comics, but hot damn! This design by frequent Morrison collaborator, artist Frank Quietly just blew me away! The only thing that really baffles me about this sexy one-of-a-kind attire is with all the skin she's showing, why on earth would Emma Frost want to cover up her neck? Blah! Who cares?
5) SARA PEZZINI
Sara Pezzini, wielder of the Witchblade, has dealt many times with the sentient weapon/artifact that has a mind of its own. And apparently, despite the need to protect its current owner, that sentient mind wants its host to look as sexy as possible while doing it. I wonder when donning the armor if Sara feels any type of metallic chaffing.
Just look at the face of the former Avenger, Moondragon. I'd be pretty bummed too if I had a hot body with the perfect outfit to show it off in with a head as bald as a baby's butt. I wonder with all the medical and technological breakthroughs Reed Richards of the Fantastic Four has made, why he hasn't come up with something that will grow a full head of hair for this gal. But she looks so hot with that skimpy outfit and flowing cape that we're willing to look past that bald noggin of hers, right guys? Guys? Okay, I guess I'm alone in this.
3) SHANNA THE SHE-DEVIL
It must get really hot and humid in Savage Land. Poor Shanna, jungle warrior, PETA member and all around hottie, has to practically strip down to her birthday suite in order not to overheat. Not that any of us fanboys are complaining. An ally to all wildlife and an enemy to hunters and poachers, it's a wonder Shanna doesn't stop evil-doers dead in their tracks by merely giving them a glimpse of that skimpy outfit hers. I tell ya, this sexy Queen of the Jungle can spank my monkey any day of the week.
Damn! Those female alien vampires from the planet Draculon sure know how to put one helluva skimpy-ass outfit together. Take Vampirella here for example. She comes from a planet were its inhabitants live entirely on blood. Hell, her planets rivers even flow blood! But I digress. Just take a gander at outfit of hers. It just screams skimpy! All it would take to get her out of that outfit is a couple of snips with a pair of scissors. If I ever run into her on a dark and spooky night while she's blood lusting, don't be so surprised if you see footage of my blood drained corpse on the evening news. Chances are I was the one chasing her.
Now whose outfit could possibly be even skimpier than Vampirella's and take the number 1 spot? Let's find out…
All I'm gonna say is that it looks likes there's something here in this article for the ladies after all. ‘Nuff said.